Tue 30th Aug 2005


I arrived at work this morning to find the door closed. Once again I had to use the retinal scan. I walked over to the unit and offered my eye.

“Please – stand – a little - further – back” she said.

I know the scanner is a she, because she has a woman’s voice.

“Morning.” I said, just like I always say.

“Identity confirmed” she replied. It’s a little ritual we go through every morning. The door clicked and I moved towards the lift.

“You – have – a – lovely – eye” she said.

I stopped in my tracks. She’d never been so forward before. Suddenly our relationship was at an entirely new level.

“Thankyou” I replied, taken aback.

“I – think- I – - love – you. Can – there – be – any future – for us?”

I thought I could hear a trace of sadness behind the mechanised American accent. I was intrigued, but it was time I nipped this in the bud.

“I doubt it love. You’re a retinal scanning machine, and I am a real boy.”

At first there was no reply. But then I began to notice the scanning area glowing red, and an ominous humming filled the air…

And then I woke up. It had all been a dream. And I was very late for work.